it wasn't lemon gatorade
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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