fuck your aforementioned shoe
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Alive.
So much puke
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
