ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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