On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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