Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Randomize
