sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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