Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
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