If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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