i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Randomize
