i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I have so many feelings about this burrito
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Randomize