After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Randomize
