What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
