This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
