Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Randomize