Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
This house was built for laser tag.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
Enjoy the penises
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
