YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
My vagina is very pro this idea
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
