everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize