I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Randomize
