So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
