I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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