You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
So many bounce houses so little time
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
