Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Randomize