i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
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