I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
