I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Randomize
