i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I think I sprained my soul last night
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
