school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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