No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize