party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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