Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
