Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
