just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
i've created a new STD.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Randomize
