He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
