Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
