So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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