Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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