just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
