now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
cat food counts as protein by the way
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
