i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
