it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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