I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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