i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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