Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize
