So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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