he puts the penis in happiness.
Quick, to the slutcave!
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Drunk walkin through police station. America
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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