You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
