I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
