Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize