he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Randomize
