so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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